I have been a little discouraged for the last week or so. Yeah, I HAD been feeling great, but then I started feeling NOT great. I screwed up my BCP's. Then I screwed up the supplement that I have been taking that is supposed to help my mood. So I did a lot of running, alone, on the treadmill last week (instead of taking classes).
Then over the weekend, I proceeded to eat crap, drink crap, eat more crap... leaving me to FEEL like crap while trying to work out today. My face was red, my throat was dry, my lips are chapped. I wanted to die... well, not really, I just wanted to lay down and take a nap on the gym floor.
But anyways.... I am going to re-hydrate. I am going to keep working out. I am still going to eat crap on occassion, but I am going to TRY to limit it to ONE meal of crap per week. And I am just going to try to squeeze in more veggies everyday.
WHY does it require so much effort to feel good? I mean the work that goes into feeling good is definitely easier than sitting around feeling like a fat piece of crap... but still... sometimes I wish that JUST ONE thing, on occassion, could just be a little bit easy.
OK... back to my gala apple and Non-Fat Greek yogurt.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Hormones
The hormones are definately kicking in. I haven't really had PMS since going on the pill. Real PMS. The kind where you want to literally shoot daggers out of your eyes and slay people. Boy does this feel shitty. I got irrationally pissed off at a hair tye. A hair tye! I feel so sorry for Frank right now. I am not going to be fun for the next 4 days.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Inspired
I had a phyiscal a month ago. I had my yearly this morning. Both docs advised me to start exercising and drop weight. (Also, btw, I am not as tall as I thought I was. Am I shrinking already or do I have a permanent computer hunch?) So I really need to do something. I need to get inspired. Only issue, how do I do that?
I really liked the nights we met at school tracks and ran/walked because it combined social gabbing with exercise, but that's really hard to do with everyone's schedules and how dark it gets early now. Maybe I should look into joining a running group. Maybe I just need to get off the couch and stop finding reasons to stay put.
So, I am stopping drinking soda (again). For real this time. I am stopping my DD or BK breakfast sandwich addiction. (more $$ in my pocket!) I am going to set the alarm earlier, though I think that may be the first thing to fail. I am going to try to walk around the neighborhood every night. And if I do fail, I promise to start back up again and not just give up.
I really liked the nights we met at school tracks and ran/walked because it combined social gabbing with exercise, but that's really hard to do with everyone's schedules and how dark it gets early now. Maybe I should look into joining a running group. Maybe I just need to get off the couch and stop finding reasons to stay put.
So, I am stopping drinking soda (again). For real this time. I am stopping my DD or BK breakfast sandwich addiction. (more $$ in my pocket!) I am going to set the alarm earlier, though I think that may be the first thing to fail. I am going to try to walk around the neighborhood every night. And if I do fail, I promise to start back up again and not just give up.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
From my Cubie to my Car
Just sitting here thinking about how far I have to walk to get to my car (in the dark) is exhausting me. Lol! Here is my journey from my warm cozy cubicle to my cold car:
I walk from my cubicle, down the hall to the elevator.
I ride the elevator to the Lower Lobby.
I walk through the Lobby.
I walk past the auditorium and through the funny tunnel.
Say good night as I pass that nice man.
I walk past the cafeteria.
I go through the doorway and walk up a large flight of stairs.
I go out the entrance and down the sidewalk (past the visitor's parking lot).
I cross the street.
I walk past another building/parking lot.
I cross another street.
I then FINALLY arrive safely at my car in the parking lot to start my car and race home as fast as possible.
;o)
I walk from my cubicle, down the hall to the elevator.
I ride the elevator to the Lower Lobby.
I walk through the Lobby.
I walk past the auditorium and through the funny tunnel.
Say good night as I pass that nice man.
I walk past the cafeteria.
I go through the doorway and walk up a large flight of stairs.
I go out the entrance and down the sidewalk (past the visitor's parking lot).
I cross the street.
I walk past another building/parking lot.
I cross another street.
I then FINALLY arrive safely at my car in the parking lot to start my car and race home as fast as possible.
;o)
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Sh!t or get off the pot... Then go weigh yourself
For THREE WEEKS I have been eating better (not perfect every second, but I eat veggies everyday, cook dinner in the evenings, etc.) and I have been working out (at LEAST 4 times a week, but I am trying to do 5 or 6). And how much have a lost in those three weeks... ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. That scale is set at it's number and it is sticking with it. I mean, down to the .6 of a lb. I mean come on- things going in... things coming out... time of the month... my weight should fluctuate from day to day at least a BIT.
Nope. Nothing. NADA. Zilch.
But... then I start to think... So what? I mean, really - am I discouraged? One might think I should be, but I am not. Why you wonder? Because I FEEL good. I hardly ever get heartburn any more. I feel strong. My moods have leveled out. AND I am saving money by not buying crap on the weekends for "Fat Sunday".
Even if I never lose a single tenth of a pound, I FEEL GOOD and THAT is what matters the most.
Nope. Nothing. NADA. Zilch.
But... then I start to think... So what? I mean, really - am I discouraged? One might think I should be, but I am not. Why you wonder? Because I FEEL good. I hardly ever get heartburn any more. I feel strong. My moods have leveled out. AND I am saving money by not buying crap on the weekends for "Fat Sunday".
Even if I never lose a single tenth of a pound, I FEEL GOOD and THAT is what matters the most.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
I love my friends
This is just a love note to you girls. I had a wonderful time at Connie's house with you on Saturday night. I am not a great caller or emailer, often just doing my own thing, and after too many weekends like that I start to feel so distant from you guys. This past weekend was a great reminder of why I like hanging out with you, and how we are still in touch with each other even when we are all too busy to hang out all the time.
PS. Sarah, I'd love to hang out with you soon, hear about work & Daisy & the new house.
PS. Sarah, I'd love to hang out with you soon, hear about work & Daisy & the new house.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Diet Overhaul
All I have to say is... Baba Ganoush is DISGUSTING and Fat Free Cottage Cheese is pretty nasty, too.
BUT I have discovered that Voila frozen bag dinners are easy, convenient and healthy. Chipotle hummus is the SCRUMPTIOUS. Egg white omlets with bits of veggies and 1/4 C. of cheddar cheese is actually quite satisfying.
Today is my appointment at the gym where I will have my body fat % measured... I am dying to know what it is... and once I do, I am sure I will be dying to forget it!
This month's issue of Fitness magazine has a bunch of healthy, low cal, low fat soup recipes. I am planning to try a few in the very near future. One recipe has little turkey meatballs in it.
BUT I have discovered that Voila frozen bag dinners are easy, convenient and healthy. Chipotle hummus is the SCRUMPTIOUS. Egg white omlets with bits of veggies and 1/4 C. of cheddar cheese is actually quite satisfying.
Today is my appointment at the gym where I will have my body fat % measured... I am dying to know what it is... and once I do, I am sure I will be dying to forget it!
This month's issue of Fitness magazine has a bunch of healthy, low cal, low fat soup recipes. I am planning to try a few in the very near future. One recipe has little turkey meatballs in it.
Friday, October 2, 2009
This is the fatest I will ever be from here on out
I will never be this fat again. That's right, I will be losing weight and getting into shape. I am hoping to have some noticable changes in my body by the holidays.
I meant with the nutritionist this morning. I thought - heh, I know it all. I need to eat more veggies. I am sure I won't learn anything new. But I actually DID learn new things. I have a follow up appointment in two weeks.
Then I headed over to the gym for a "Box 'n' Burn" class. After that I had a meeting to go over my work out schedule. I want to get some strength training into my "routine". But because I had just worked out and showered and changed back into my work clothes, she couldn't do any measurements and my BP was high from just working out - so I have another appointment with her next week (Thursday) and she will take my fat %, test my flexibility, endurance, etc. She is going to show me how to properly do lunges and squats (I hurt my knee yesterday and she says that people commonly hurt their knees from doing lunges and squats incorrectly). Then we we go over a strength training routine for me! Whoo hoo!
I am feeling VERY positive about all this. THANK GOD my work has all this stuff. If I couldn't do these things on my lunch break, I wouldn't be able to squeeze them in! The nutritionist is free to employees. I have to pay for the gym, but meeting to set up an exercise routine is included in my membership. I am also going to enter the contest for 8 weeks of free personal training (wish me luck on that!!).
Hmmm... Maybe I should take a before picture??
I meant with the nutritionist this morning. I thought - heh, I know it all. I need to eat more veggies. I am sure I won't learn anything new. But I actually DID learn new things. I have a follow up appointment in two weeks.
Then I headed over to the gym for a "Box 'n' Burn" class. After that I had a meeting to go over my work out schedule. I want to get some strength training into my "routine". But because I had just worked out and showered and changed back into my work clothes, she couldn't do any measurements and my BP was high from just working out - so I have another appointment with her next week (Thursday) and she will take my fat %, test my flexibility, endurance, etc. She is going to show me how to properly do lunges and squats (I hurt my knee yesterday and she says that people commonly hurt their knees from doing lunges and squats incorrectly). Then we we go over a strength training routine for me! Whoo hoo!
I am feeling VERY positive about all this. THANK GOD my work has all this stuff. If I couldn't do these things on my lunch break, I wouldn't be able to squeeze them in! The nutritionist is free to employees. I have to pay for the gym, but meeting to set up an exercise routine is included in my membership. I am also going to enter the contest for 8 weeks of free personal training (wish me luck on that!!).
Hmmm... Maybe I should take a before picture??
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Hou$e
Crap. Frankie called to say we need a new roof. A whole roof!
Frank knew our flashing and gutters were installed wrong - that became evident last winter. So he's been planning on redo-ing the fascia board and soffits since then. Our soffits are not vented correctly either, btw. Well, he's been reluctant to get started on the project because it seemed so huge. So, we agreed to get some quotes. A gutter company we found at the Hebron Fair came over on Tues. and gave us a quote to fix the soffits and install their fancy gutters. It was reasonable. For comparison's sake, we called a roofer too. The roofer just met with Frank and pointed out that our roof wasn't put on correctly either. The plywood sheathing is starting to buckle from moisture - the original issue was ice damning that blocks up the gutters and forces water up under the eaves - so that should really be replaced. The whole roof should be pulled up, anything rotting replaced, and ice membrane installed (we have none now) and all flashing installed, then the roof put back on. The soffits rebuilt and properly vented, the drip edge (we don't have one now) installed, and then the gutters put on correctly. Whew.
We will never have money. I should not have gotten a new car. We will never get a new shed. Being a homeowner is just so disappointing. I thought we got a good house. I thought the home inspector would point out crap like this. As it turns out, the previous homeowner mickey-moused everything!
Grrrr.
Frank knew our flashing and gutters were installed wrong - that became evident last winter. So he's been planning on redo-ing the fascia board and soffits since then. Our soffits are not vented correctly either, btw. Well, he's been reluctant to get started on the project because it seemed so huge. So, we agreed to get some quotes. A gutter company we found at the Hebron Fair came over on Tues. and gave us a quote to fix the soffits and install their fancy gutters. It was reasonable. For comparison's sake, we called a roofer too. The roofer just met with Frank and pointed out that our roof wasn't put on correctly either. The plywood sheathing is starting to buckle from moisture - the original issue was ice damning that blocks up the gutters and forces water up under the eaves - so that should really be replaced. The whole roof should be pulled up, anything rotting replaced, and ice membrane installed (we have none now) and all flashing installed, then the roof put back on. The soffits rebuilt and properly vented, the drip edge (we don't have one now) installed, and then the gutters put on correctly. Whew.
We will never have money. I should not have gotten a new car. We will never get a new shed. Being a homeowner is just so disappointing. I thought we got a good house. I thought the home inspector would point out crap like this. As it turns out, the previous homeowner mickey-moused everything!
Grrrr.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
trainer
I've had 4 real sessions with my trainer. 3 in the last two weeks.
O...M....G....
I already feel a little different, not that it's visible, but I...love....it...
I love the challenge, mental and physical. i love the trainer who wants to push me, who wants to see me succeed.
He wants to show my how to punch for real, invest in the gloves and wraps and everything. i think i'll do it.
After yesterday's workout, he asked if my fiance appreciated what i was doing there. And I SHOULD have said...I appreciate it. ME. I'm doing this for me. and it's already very positively affected my confidence. I'm pumped! Trainer is curious to meet Eric. He says a lot of the tough girls he sees, the guys, aren't as tough. I think i actually impress the unimpressable trainer. He had a huge smile on his face when i finished the "300"....which....by the way...is the type of workouts (not on the same level, of course!) that the tasty men in the movie 300 did to get in shape. I can see how it worked.
I'm even getting into protein shakes and amino acid supplements. serious business. now...my biggest challenge, is the weekend. UConn football tailgating. dinner for Theresa's birthday. possibly the Big E. How will i get through all of that w/o drinking too much or eating like a big fatty? ~sigh~ Well, i guess I'll just think about the food diary i told the trainer i would keep, and hope that keeps me on the straight and narrow-ish.
O...M....G....
I already feel a little different, not that it's visible, but I...love....it...
I love the challenge, mental and physical. i love the trainer who wants to push me, who wants to see me succeed.
He wants to show my how to punch for real, invest in the gloves and wraps and everything. i think i'll do it.
After yesterday's workout, he asked if my fiance appreciated what i was doing there. And I SHOULD have said...I appreciate it. ME. I'm doing this for me. and it's already very positively affected my confidence. I'm pumped! Trainer is curious to meet Eric. He says a lot of the tough girls he sees, the guys, aren't as tough. I think i actually impress the unimpressable trainer. He had a huge smile on his face when i finished the "300"....which....by the way...is the type of workouts (not on the same level, of course!) that the tasty men in the movie 300 did to get in shape. I can see how it worked.
I'm even getting into protein shakes and amino acid supplements. serious business. now...my biggest challenge, is the weekend. UConn football tailgating. dinner for Theresa's birthday. possibly the Big E. How will i get through all of that w/o drinking too much or eating like a big fatty? ~sigh~ Well, i guess I'll just think about the food diary i told the trainer i would keep, and hope that keeps me on the straight and narrow-ish.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Gym Day #5
OH YEAH! I could SERIOUSLY use a nap right about now... These classes at the gym have been kicking my @$$. But I am certain that as I stick with it, it will get easier pretty fast.
Of course, now I am hungry and the Quinoa that I brought just does NOT sound like enough...
Of course, now I am hungry and the Quinoa that I brought just does NOT sound like enough...
Monday, September 14, 2009
Friday, August 28, 2009
Gym Day #1
So - I started at the gym today. The gym at work had a deal going on - 10 visits for $10. I thought that would be a great way to try it out and see if I can get it to fit into my schedule! Today, I took a class - "Tone Boxing". I had a hard time keeping up - which, I knew I would since I have not been exercising lately. But I totally LOVED it. It was nice to get away from my desk and then come back revived and ready to tackle my afternoon!
I weighed myself this morning... It was bad. I have gained quite a bit. But that is OK. My goal is to lose 60 lbs in the next year - give or take. I was losing 0.8 lbs a week b/f I got PG... I would be happy to go back to that rate. It was totally do-able.
I weighed myself this morning... It was bad. I have gained quite a bit. But that is OK. My goal is to lose 60 lbs in the next year - give or take. I was losing 0.8 lbs a week b/f I got PG... I would be happy to go back to that rate. It was totally do-able.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
WARNING: NO BOYS ALLOWED!!!!!!
My Dress...i think....
http://forums.canadianbride.com/Topic519880-13-1.aspx#bm524053
For those who don't know, the swatch I picked up for the first dress I wanted ended up being a very icky color. This one however, I think will by juuust right :)
http://forums.canadianbride.com/Topic519880-13-1.aspx#bm524053
For those who don't know, the swatch I picked up for the first dress I wanted ended up being a very icky color. This one however, I think will by juuust right :)
CNG
I paid my late CNG bill twice in July, so that means I paid 4 months worth of gas bills at once. SWEET! Now I can afford the $60 for the first 15 minutes and $28 every additional 15 minutes that it will cost to have my furnace inspected and cleaned in September :-/
I am very much looking forward to the party this weekend and LDW...woot woot!
I am very much looking forward to the party this weekend and LDW...woot woot!
Monday, August 24, 2009
I give up...
I was trying to add pictures from this weekend, but I can only seem to get one picture to upload. Oh well... Here is a cute profile picutre of Logan!!Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Good and Bad, but now mostly good.
My b-day was last week and all we did was stay in and order pizza, and it was glorious.
Friday into the weekend, I had the worst work experience in my life. But it's been resolved and the issues that exist on our end have been identified and are (hopefully) being handled on an agency wide level now.
But beyond that, Eric got me a gym membership for my birthday and it came with a fitness evaluation with a personal trainer. The guy was AWESOME, and I had a really fun, motivating workout with him...and he liked working with me so much that he gave me 2 sessions a week (for a year! EEK!) for $20 more a month than just once a week. So basically I'm paying $25 bucks a session when it's normally 40 - 45! PLUS he waived the $99 sign-up fee. And he asked me to write him a testimonial before i start, after 3 months, after 6 months and at 12 months. i am SO excited!!!
i also mentioned my thoughts about being a trainer at some point and he was all excited and said that if that was something i was interested in down the road that he would definitely talk to me about it because he thinks i would be great at it :) YAY!
So i go again tomorrow for my first real session then really start cranking when i come back from camping this weekend in Saratoga. YAAAY!
Now, i'll just have to quit my expensive haircuts, highlights and facials in order to pay for the fitness trainer! ~gulp~
Friday into the weekend, I had the worst work experience in my life. But it's been resolved and the issues that exist on our end have been identified and are (hopefully) being handled on an agency wide level now.
But beyond that, Eric got me a gym membership for my birthday and it came with a fitness evaluation with a personal trainer. The guy was AWESOME, and I had a really fun, motivating workout with him...and he liked working with me so much that he gave me 2 sessions a week (for a year! EEK!) for $20 more a month than just once a week. So basically I'm paying $25 bucks a session when it's normally 40 - 45! PLUS he waived the $99 sign-up fee. And he asked me to write him a testimonial before i start, after 3 months, after 6 months and at 12 months. i am SO excited!!!
i also mentioned my thoughts about being a trainer at some point and he was all excited and said that if that was something i was interested in down the road that he would definitely talk to me about it because he thinks i would be great at it :) YAY!
So i go again tomorrow for my first real session then really start cranking when i come back from camping this weekend in Saratoga. YAAAY!
Now, i'll just have to quit my expensive haircuts, highlights and facials in order to pay for the fitness trainer! ~gulp~
Friday, August 14, 2009
Things I Find Therapeutic
1. Coffee with the Girls
2. Chatting with friends, family or hubby over a bottle or two of wine
3. Roaming the craft store
4. Puzzle Books (like Sudoku)
5. Journaling
6. Going to the Movies
7. Reading novels
8. Doing things Outside
9. Sitting on the dock at The Lake
10. Labor Day Weekend at The Lake
11. Exercise (the part when I am all done)
12. Returning things to the store that I bought but didn't really need
13. Throwing things away
14. Breaking things so I can then throw them away
15. A Day at the Spa (HA! Who WOULDN'T find that therapeutic??)
16. Spendging time alone
17. Spending unlimited time in a book store
18. That FIRST beer at a bar (on tap - not from a bottle)
19. Finding that other people have problems, too and not everyone is happy all the time
20. Having a stupendous support group of friends and family
21. Doing something new with Logan (ex. watching his expression as he tries a new food, giving him a new toy and watching him study it for HOURS)
22. Doing Crafts!
23. Snuggling with my Hubby
24. "Sleeping" in when Logan let's us
25. Not having to wake up to an alarm clock anymore
26. Reading about things on the internet
27. Swimming
28. Sitting back and watching all my friends laughing and enjoying each other's company
29. Seeing a flower that I planted in my yard bloom (this doesn't happen very often! Lol!)
30. Having a productive day - either at home or at work
2. Chatting with friends, family or hubby over a bottle or two of wine
3. Roaming the craft store
4. Puzzle Books (like Sudoku)
5. Journaling
6. Going to the Movies
7. Reading novels
8. Doing things Outside
9. Sitting on the dock at The Lake
10. Labor Day Weekend at The Lake
11. Exercise (the part when I am all done)
12. Returning things to the store that I bought but didn't really need
13. Throwing things away
14. Breaking things so I can then throw them away
15. A Day at the Spa (HA! Who WOULDN'T find that therapeutic??)
16. Spendging time alone
17. Spending unlimited time in a book store
18. That FIRST beer at a bar (on tap - not from a bottle)
19. Finding that other people have problems, too and not everyone is happy all the time
20. Having a stupendous support group of friends and family
21. Doing something new with Logan (ex. watching his expression as he tries a new food, giving him a new toy and watching him study it for HOURS)
22. Doing Crafts!
23. Snuggling with my Hubby
24. "Sleeping" in when Logan let's us
25. Not having to wake up to an alarm clock anymore
26. Reading about things on the internet
27. Swimming
28. Sitting back and watching all my friends laughing and enjoying each other's company
29. Seeing a flower that I planted in my yard bloom (this doesn't happen very often! Lol!)
30. Having a productive day - either at home or at work
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Retraction
Ok, so in the post I deleted I was very upset with my dental insurance snafu and blamed the wrong person. The benefits lady we used to have wasn't the greatest and I assumed it was her fault. She actually did send in the information of my benefits upgrade to the insurance company - she just didn't follow up afterwards to make sure it processed correctly, and the insurance company made the mistake. I apologize.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Sunshine-y & Sh*t
I am having a good feelings day. I'm all sunshine-y. So if you are in a bad mood, just ignore this post. I am just feeling really connected to my hubby and my friends. I know I don't get to see you all very much, but I was really happy to be able to see Kate, Mike, Sarah, Jay, Sher & Shawn this weekend. It was all very chill - but exactly what I needed. And I'm amazed by the families that are being created in my circle of friends. It was very cool to meet little Mike and see another new family begin.
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